40 things to do in my 40th year

It is New Years Eve Day, 2019. I have a limited amount of time to write this blog as I am using my toddler girl Rebel’s nap time to reflect a little bit. So I am going to freestyle it.

First of all, I want to say that I have never really been one to set a New Years resolution, if anything…I might do something like that on my birthday. Birthdays are the day to remember that the world is (or could be) a better place because you were born, so I think it is a chance to start new again, in a new age, a new year of life, but also to celebrate what brought me here. My birthday was a big one this past year. In June, I turned 40.

Instead of throwing a GIANT party, I made a list of 40 things to do in my 40th year. Why not throw a party for myself all year long?! 40 is a milestone!

One of my favorite things to check off my list, was to visit The Museum of Ice Cream in San Francisco. In September, Kyrik (my hubby) and I packed our bags to San Francisco, specifically to find the Museum of Ice Cream and jump (or slide) into a pool of SPRINKLES! This was our first trip away from our Rebel girl, 2 1/2 years old now.

This past summer had been a really difficult time for me. I am still figuring it all out. I used to be afraid to talk about this publicly, but I think if I talk about it more often, it could help others, or help me too. In May, I got really sick and ended up in the hospital with an afib or maybe even a ventricular tachycardia episode. My life went downhill after this event, and my entire summer was spent feeling like I was upside down, fighting vertigo attacks. I spent days in the cardiologist office to come home to a phone call from my specialist telling me he was confused as to why I had a slightly enlarged upper atrial chamber in my heart. I spent endless nights waking up to a heart rate of over 150bpm, and feeling like I was choking in my sleep. After several tries at asking for a sleep study from nurse practitioners (who turned me down because I wasn’t 300 lbs and my neck wasn’t wide enough), my cardiologist agreed to refer me, and tadaaaa! I found out I had sleep apnea. It took until AFTER our San Francisco trip in September to finally get the equipment I needed to get treated. I had spent the entire summer trying to get by, day to day walking around like a MOMBIE. It felt like I was losing my sparkle. Sometimes I’d wake up in the middle of the night, my chest hurting, my heart racing so fast, the room spinning. I’d dial 911, thinking I was dying. By the time the EMTs arrived, my heart rate had returned to normal and I’d feel kind of stupid, with a whole group of uniformed EMTs standing around staring at me with bedhead and my pajamas on. That was what sleep apnea did to me.

But what I’ve taken away from my experiences battling a chronic illness, is that I should live my life to the fullest. Even though I don’t have all the answers to what is going on with me, and why, I have a purpose to serve, because I am still here. Have I slowed down? Yes. I’ve used time spent that I would normally be taking detailed orders in the kitchen to go to the chiropractor, take a nap with Rebel, or…go to San Francisco and jump in a pool of sprinkles!

I have this gut feeling that the adversity that I face is for a greater purpose. Through becoming this glittery “Amanda Cupcake” personality who loves to bake recipes on local television, I’ve discovered how much I love to share my stories, so I added to the list-that I would like to pursue a passion that I have for public speaking.

Kyrik and I spoke in front of 800 people (some of them Packer alumni), at the Green & Gold Gala/Lambeau Field this year. I found the courage to stand up and speak about my challenges as a new mother, and overcoming postpartum depression. Finding the courage to share my not-so-pretty story surprisingly empowered me so much, so many women came up after and hugged me, with tears in their eyes begging me to continue sharing my story.

I was a featured artist at Mission Church Appleton’s Art Camp. I stood up in front of 400 kids to share my story of how to “find and share your sparkle” when you are afraid. After, I taught the kids how to decorate their own cupcakes (and I bedazzled cupcakes on stage, even with having vertigo all day!!)

I’ve checked a few things off of my list, but these are just a few of my favorites, because they speak to my heart & my soul.

Here’s my full list, let’s see if I can spend 2020 checking the rest of it off. I plan on sharing here on my blog as much as I can.

40 THINGS TO DO IN MY 40TH YEAR:
1.Go to a concert of a singer I love
2.Turn my hair into the hair that I love (I wear a pink wig most of the time but I’d love to LOVE my own hair)
3.Find a skin care routine that works for my FORTY YEAR OLD skin!!! hah!
4.Go on some kind of a tropical getaway
5.Go to the Museum of Ice Cream/San Francisco
6.Travel somewhere fun & local/vacation there as a family.
7.Focus in on what I really want for my career path (public speaking, blogging, and making videos).
8.Get my children’s book (Sweet Dreamer) published.
9.Learn how to hip hop dance
10.Start working on memoir books of Rebel, my work, and our family.
11.Spend more time with my mom & dad.
12.Perform 40 acts of kindness.
13.Write a letter to my 50 year old self and have others in my life write one to me too, save it in a time capsule.
14.Re-acquaint myself with applying makeup (I used to be a master at makeup, but now so much has changed).
15.Go on dates with my husband, aim for once a month.
16.Write my will.
17.Turn a space into my home into a “me” space to do yoga or take photos of my art.
18.Do a smash cake photo shoot of me being…40 (instead of 1). ♥
19.Start making fun printed tshirts.
20.Create a fairy garden.
21.Instead of social media every night before bed, read a book, do some creative writing, or meditate.
22.Start seeing the dentist on a more regular basis.
23.Go to an aquarium with Rebel & Kyrik.
24.Go to a zoo with Rebel & Kyrik.
25.See the Lion King (because I love that movie).
26.Go see a play or a musical at a theater.
27.Learn how to do calligraphy or some type of really amazing artistic writing.
28.Go to museums with interesting exhibits.
29.Go to a drag queen or burlesque show.
30.Ride a mechanical bull, or even a mechanical unicorn.
31.Read to a group of kids, dressed up as Amanda Cupcake, maybe at the library?
32.Go do something beautiful outside in the winter, even if it is cold (Apostle Islands? Ice skating with Rebel?)
33.Start getting involved with a church and find out where I fit in a church body.
34.Start making pretty salads and take photos of them like they are art.
35.Perform in an open mic night whether it is reading a poem or singing.
36.Start working on a garden.
37.Start barre classes, or yoga, find my happy fit self again.
38.Go glamping (not camping..glamping).
39.Work on another children’s book with Kyrik (title is a secret).
40.Learn how to make pretty coffee drinks. ♥